A Day in the Life...

3-0

2012-02-13T23:43:00.001-07:00

When Tim makes a baby bottle, he shakes it for at least one or two full minutes. It might be the most irritating sound in the whole world. If it were real milk, it'd turn to butter before he was done shaking it.

Some dads don't do much, or do too much of the wrong thing. My kids are lucky- their dad helps feed them, change them, bathe them, play with them, and love them. He doesn't hold back- when they're being too much to handle, he tells them so. But he also doesn't hold back love or laughter. He's nice to have.

This past week he celebrated his 30th! I keep telling him it feels exactly the same but he thinks otherwise. In celebration, I picked up the kids early from the sitters and we took off to buy gifts and food. It might sound fun to take three babies to Walmart and Cal-Ranch, but it's really not. It's more like a chore. Copper knocked over a few boxes of toy horses and I accidentally head-butted her to tears. But, we did it, and we rushed home to make his favorite dinner of chicken parmigiana- and decorate the house. This is how I pictured it: balloons and signs hung, gifts wrapped, dinner staying warm in the oven, and all of us "hiding" behind our table to jump out and yell surprise. Eat a nice dinner, blow out some candles, and enjoy our time together. Kids to bed early and the two of us watching about ten episodes of Jericho because it is that good.

This is how it really went: Came home from shopping and the babies were starving because I forget to feed them when we're out and about; Copper trying to blow the balloons up herself and upset that she can't; one batch of spaghetti noodles to pot because I let them boil for almost an eternity; Copper crying because she can't eat the treats we wrapped up; dishes and clothes and toys everywhere- Everywhere. Instead of hiding when we hear the garage door open, I'm changing Micah, who has a gallon of spit up coming up her throat and a lot of poop coming out her rear. Copper is still whining, now because she can't eat chocolate chip Teddy Grahams, and then because she didn't get to hide and scare Tim. We did not watch Jake Green save his town.

So he got a halfhearted birthday evening. But at least Copper spit on his dessert to rid the candle flames.

In spite of our crashed attempt at a celebration of life, it was a good evening. I realized that if Tim wants to shake the babies bottle, let him shake his little heart out; at least he's up and shaking away. And although I get sad and anxious and upset when life throws me into a tornado, at least I have a family to ride it with. And although he' so old now, a good guy to pull me down. Just think... next year on his 31st birthday, we'll have two 18-month old girls breaking spaghetti noodles everywhere and an almost four year old with more spit to blow out the candles. Life might get better but not sure how.

This post is about our kids. What a surprise.

2012-01-21T21:19:00.002-07:00

Copper is 2.5 years old. She weighs a whopping 26 pounds and is the pickiest eater there ever was. I offered her a handful of chocolate in exchange for eating one grape and she walked away. I finally got her to bite a cucumber and it may have been one of the worst moments of her life. She lives off of peanut butter, string cheese, bread, yogurt, and anything snacky- chips, pretzels, crackers, and not to mention all sweets. Most of the time, Copper is a highlight of our days. She loves to dress up. She would wear her swimming suit every day, even during winter. She LOVES carousels, her blankets, and trains. She's pretty happy most of the time, still has that classic smile, and just when she's tricked the world into thinking all is grand, she throws a major meltdown. Maybe it's partly her age, though I hear age 3 is worse, and maybe it's partly because the huge life changes over the last several months are catching up. Just this last week Copper cried for an hour, really, because she couldn't sit on the baby-sitter's toilet longer. And because she couldn't wear her boots to bed. Which, actually, she ended up doing anyway. Despite her crazy tantrums, Copper really is a doll. She's absolutely gorgeous and has an all-star dynamic personality.

Micah at six months is nothing like Micah at two months. Obviously the growth is different. But what's really different is her personality. As an infant she was so content laying on her own and observing the world. She rarely cried. Now, the sweet little monster cries almost every evening. Still. She's sitting up on her own and may be able to roll over if she gave herself time on her belly and back to practice. She hates it, usually. She loves to be held and at night likes her hand to be right below my mouth, I think so she can feel my breathing. (Remember Copper slept with her hand in my mouth for months??) She is the observer, usually. She watches everything that goes on and (as long her she's content and her belly feels okay) loves to watch what's going on around her. Micah loves to eat food and will eat a jar of pears, applesauce, or sweet potatoes on her own. She still spits up more than she takes in. Sometimes it's full of food she just had. Talk about disgusting. She can't wait to grow out of her digestive troubles and the rest of us can't wait either. She has super blond hair that curls right up. At her 6 month check up Micah is 13.11 pounds (7%), 25.75 inches (45%), and her head is 15.5 inches (0%). Small but proportionate.

Dakota is also very different from a few months ago. She's grown out of her crying, for the most part. She's a champ eater. She makes the goofiest faces and usually has her eyebrows raised. She tries to beat Micah up, stealing her stuff, trying to pull her socks off, and ripping the binkie from her mouth. The one time this weekend that Micah ripped it back, Kota sat there a bit dumbfounded for a minute. Taste of her own medicine, I guess. Kota is sitting and rolling. She seems to be a few weeks to a month ahead of Micah, developmentally. She's turning into a pretty happy baby. She puts herself to sleep when she's tired, plays great on her own, and smiles a lot. At six months, Kota weighs 14.13 (25%), is 25 inches long (20%), and her head is 16.25 inches (10%).

A few days out of the week look like this, where they're all screaming and you kind of feel like shooting yourself or just running away.

But there are more days like this, which makes life a bit easier...

Okay, well, they're actually crying here, even Kota, but I contribute it to shots. And the pic is cure.

New Year's

2012-01-16T07:53:00.002-07:00

We spent New Year's evening with Tim's family. You can't tell from the following picture, but Micah cried and cried. Only when she was in her carseat to come home did she smile. Kota was pretty happy. And, as you can see from the pictures, Copper was a complete ham. A cute one, at least!

Copper's Crazy Chatter

2012-01-03T20:35:00.000-07:00

Copper talking to me while in deep contemplation:

"Ma fart? NO.... Copper fart? NO.... Dad fart? Yea, yea, yea!"

No, these are NOT my babies

2011-12-30T21:12:00.000-07:00

Though they are cute.

I found this pic and it cracked me up. Mostly because it hinted of truth.

I'm pretty blessed to get two babies at once. Though "fun" was the last thing I thought when we found out, there was this small flicker of excitement. When I say small, I mean small. Really small. And the flicker almost diminished by the time they hit 2-3 months, started crying, and didn't seem to stop. Healthy set of lungs, these babies have.

But, still. Life is a special kind of crazy.

My babies are now 6 months old! I can't believe it. I feel like I've aged at least 200 years. The fact it's only been half a year astounds me.

At six months: Micah's figured out how to eat from a spoon. Kota can sit up like a champ. Micah's been cooing for a while and loves to talk. Kota just learned her voice can squeal and not just scream. Both giggle at the sight of Copper and find her amazing. Sometimes they look at eat other in bewilderment; other times they secretly plan to rile each other up. And it works. Both have striking blue eyes. Both have fantastic smiles. They share clothes, bottles, binkies, and germs. I wonder if each other's spit tastes the same to them as their own. Maybe, because they don't seem to mind.

They've brought madness and gladness to our home. They're growing faster than I thought possible. This is how they looked coming home from the hospital. They were the tiniest babies I've seen, outside my twin brothers, who were considerably smaller when they were born. Seem gigantic now!

Love these cuties.

Micah at 4 days

Micah at 6 months

Kota at 3 days... happy as always

Kota at 6 months

Christmas Day

2011-12-28T13:52:00.000-07:00

Christmas morning started early, as does every day. Our kids get up no later than 6:00 a.m. every day. Not one of our neighbor's lights came on until after 8:00. Wonder what sleeping in is like?! Copper loved the train expansion from Santa, all her clothes, and other toys. The babies liked the wrapping paper as much as anything else. We enjoyed chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast, and the babies had applesauce. After playing and napping, we headed over to my parents'. Again we were spoiled; the babies and Copper with more toys, and Tim and I with an outdoor fire pit for the backyard. I forgot to bring my camera at my mom's, but it was filled with the usual ham and turkey, potatoes, and treats. And kids everywhere!

The only regret I have about Christmas this year is really following the Spirit of Christmas that's everywhere this season. Growing up, our family always made/bought and delivered a Christmas dinner extravaganza to a family in need, along with presents. I've always tried to make a point of following the same Spirit of Christ. This year, at least the last half, has been pretty self-absorbed. Here's to a new year of giving instead of taking so much!

Christmas Eve

2011-12-28T09:03:00.000-07:00

Each year we spend Christmas Eve with the Helferich clan and Christmas Day with the Beck clan. This year Christmas Eve was at our house, which made it much easier with the small babies. Traditions with the Helferich family include yummy lasagna for dinner, looking at Christmas lights, and of course opening presents. Zero out of three kids napped that day, so by the time evening rolled around, all three of them were pretty whiny. Micah cried for a while and then crashed. Too bad, because we hardly got any pictures of her. Kota cried for a bit but by the end of the night was pretty happy. Copper ended up being her jovial self. As usual we were spoiled by the family... lots of gifts for the home and the kids.

Micah finally asleep!

Kota all smiles!

Copper will LOVE this pic when she's older...

Picture Overkill

2011-12-13T20:15:00.000-07:00

One day I will post about something other than my kids. But for now here is picture overload. Funny faces, fun times, little crying. Love these girls!!

Things that make me smile

2011-12-09T22:59:00.000-07:00

The way Copper shouts "wahoo!" when I say we're making chocolate chip pancakes.

How fantastically happy the babies are first thing in the morning- before they realize life is out to get them.

Our funny Christmas tree; a little something out of Charlie Brown. But cute-ish.

The laurels in our ward who come help me twice a week holding needy babies. Thursday in one hour I: made dinner, folded two loads of laundry, picked up clutter, bathed kids, and played with Copper. Whoa.

The thought of someone I know and dearly love mistaking the word podium for opium. It's the same, right? I might not ever forget this, even though it was something of ten years ago...

Remembering when Micah fell out of her car seat as I was walking down the hall at church. Only makes me smile because she didn't scream; she just laid on the floor waiting for me to pick her up. And someone else said, "Don't worry- I dropped my kid too."

Our 2011 Christmas card.

Pictures of kids on Santa's lap screaming. Thank you my friend Megan for the laugh of the year.

Our garage door working and clean enough to park in.

The backseat of my car, which three babies employ. Actually, wait, that makes me puke.

The way Copper thinks chapstick goes all over her entire face.

How I proudly hung up my patio door drapes upside down, low enough I can't open the patio doors, and crooked.

When Tim answers yes to a question I know he didn't really listen to.

This picture of sister-smothering.

Capturing the Moment

2011-12-04T11:10:00.000-07:00

2011-11-16T12:35:00.000-07:00

She is the bomb of a kid. She's also two and has the attitude of it. She loves to say, "Shh" when she's told to do something, or just a flat "no." She is pretty good natured and a complete junk food junkie. Now that the bottle is gone, she hasn't had milk in months and will have nothing to do with it, even in cereal. Not even chocolate/strawberry milk, not with a straw, not in a sippie, not in a regular cup. Determined and stubborn girl. But she is eating. Still picky but she eats food all day long. And she definitely would prefer junk over something healthy. She loves m&ms and chocolate chips. Plus cookies, pudding, candy, and anything sweet. We haven't put pantry doors on yet and I've found her numerous times climbing the shelves to the top, where she knows the "good" things are.

She was an owl for Halloween and got a kick out of trick or treating. She was fascinated by her candy and lined up in a row for days and days. She loves playing with it. I've decided she's a bit anal and sometimes a perfectionist. She likes things a certain way and it throws off her universe if it's done otherwise. For example, when tucked in at night, her blanket has to be perfectly straight. Corners have to be laid out with no creases or folds. She's like this in a lot of ways and always has been to a degree. But it's getting worse. Thanks to my therapist colleagues for pointing out she might be trying to find order in a world of chaos. Blah. Poor thing.

Things she loves: the park, her new bed, going to get the mail, movies (I think I've turned her into a couch potato), helping make dinner, playing hide and seek, having her nails clipped and painted, dressing up, and toting things around. She's always carrying a basket, bucket, bag, box, or something deep, filling it with crayons, toys, snacks, necklaces, clothes, whatever she can find. She loves playing the Wii with Tim; he has her hooked on Zelda. She loves playing with her cousins, running and screaming and making pretty horrific messes. She loves jumping from the couch onto the huge beanbag, or being thrown on it. She loves family hugs, going for rides in the car, and feeding the dumb cat our home's previous owner generously left us. (Anyone want a cat?) She loves the babies and doesn't seem too bothered by their demanding nature and continuous fussiness. They love her too and so does everyone who knows her!

Copper and her babies

2011-11-16T12:14:00.000-07:00

Copper loves, loves, loves her babies. Each morning she says, "hi, hi, hi!" in a squeaky little voice, lays on top of them in gigantic hugs, and shakes their arms nearly off in adoration.

These Babies

2011-11-15T14:54:00.050-07:00

These babies are a handful. Any baby is a handful to me, though, so maybe realistically they're just all right. I can't tell if their screaming is decreasing, really, because they still cry a lot for me. Days when I've said to myself, "man they're being soooo good!" are days when they've usually been held the entire day. I think my poor coping skills with infants is shining right through. Some days I really want to throw them or myself right out the window. No need to call CPS. Really.

The pics here are of them not crying. Mainly so that when they are screaming their little hearts out, I can look back and remind myself that sometimes their eyes are dry.

They are growing! Micah isn't as chubby as some of the pics look. She seems like one little fat 12 pounder. I think it's because she doesn't have much of a neck yet. She's weaker than Kota, even though she caught up in size pretty fast. She still sees a therapist for her neck exercises. Her biggest challenge is rotating her head clear to the right. We're supposed to lay her on her right side a lot and really encourage her to look over her right shoulder. Three sets of exercises a day. She screams like she's dying. It's obviously easier not to do them, which happens more frequently, but I know it's important. She fights it so bad that sometimes I wonder if it's having the opposite effect on her neck muscles- tightening them more instead of stretching them. But she's super cute- her hair is really coming in and is curly, curly, curly. It's curliest right out of the tub with a little lotion in it.

Kota is a funny girl. She's getting so much better at playing on her own but still loves to be held. Upright on my shoulder. She won't eat unless her attitude is just right. She has started to bat at things in front of her, though I think a lot of it is grabbing and hitting things by chance, not so much control over her body. She rolled from belly to back once for her babysitter. I haven't seen it. Maybe it was a fluke. Or she hates to perform. She's super cute too; her hair is lightening and coming in fast.

Both have killer smiles. Love them.

2011-10-20T15:07:00.002-06:00

I'm pretty tired all of the time. If I knew the kids/home/work would be taken care of for about 15 hours, I'd sleep and sleep and sleep. Or wouldn't it be great to have the world stop completely in place while I take a short nap every day.

Twin babies are not fun. They just aren't. They are cute, adorable really, and they have fantastic smiles and a very clear nearness to God. But fun is the furthest adjective I describe them with. I get that they'll be fun and I very humbly admit the blessing they are. We are very lucky to have them and learn life's lessons about patience, wholehearted love, and service. But please don't tell me I need to have fun with them. Last weekend at Costco a lady approached and said, "I had twins... one day you'll wish they were this little again." Tim immediately said, "I doubt it." And I immediately nodded my head in agreement. :)

I need to stop thinking it will be fun to go out as a family and do an activity. It is not fun. And everyone else knows it's not fun when they see two cute babies screaming their lungs out and their two year old sister who won't even sit by her family. That was our experience at Thanksgiving Point last weekend. And that's our experience every Saturday that Tim is off and I anticipate a fun time. Blah.

Work is hard. Well, really, work is easy. If I just had to worry about work every day, life would be less stressful. But in the morning I have to worry about getting myself ready, trying to work some before they're up, getting them ready, getting all of us out the door, working all day, and getting back to them within a reasonable time. And then dinner and baths and bedtime. And working a bit more. It is not easy or I am a whimp. Or both?

The house is a freaking disaster. When I say disaster, I really mean it. Somebody told me once if I worked 15-20 minutes a day in the house it would stay clean. Yeah right what a load. Haha. I think our vacuum has not seen daylight for over a month. It probably wouldn't matter anyway. Crumbs and every tiny particle finds a way to the carpet and rugs. I have boxes stacked in almost every room anticipating our move. Laundry alone is a joke. I am not kidding when I say I do LOADS of laundry every other day. Holy crap it's true.

Yesterday at work I had to stand in court and talk about a family who has some major problems going on and watch their daughter removed from home. Then I heard about an acquaintance who found out she has cancer. Then I had to deal with families all night who were in crisis- and I complained about my 12.5 hour day until I remembered they have to live with it all of the time. My battles are my battles and they are hard for me, but I wouldn't want to trade them for someone else's.

So now, even while I just typed out the things I struggle with every day, I realize my life is chock full of blessings. I have incredible support- really incredible family. Both mine and Tim's. I have an incredible sitter who loves my kids even though they're hard- the fact there's never a need to worry about their well-being while I'm gone is really cool. I have an education that's given me employment and an avenue to develop what I'm good at. I have cool co-workers and a second-to-none supervisor. I have a car that fits all of us and a little bit of extra room. We have sufficient money for the things we need and even some of the things we want. I have a husband who works and works for us, and then comes home and works some more. And there's always more. Thank goodness for gratitude and the way it clears a mind, even if the mind is super, super, super tired!