Copper's babysitter had her little girl 10 days ago. She is beautiful but very sick and will spend months in Primary Children's. And I cannot stop thinking about it. The news of her being so sick, having surgery on her tiny body, and the road ahead of her is on my mind all of the time!
I broke into tears when hearing about it because it made me realize how absolutely perfect Copper is. She is truly perfect- her body, her health, her development, her spirit, and everything else about her. I feel I've regained focus on what is important. And I really feel terrible for the times I have felt stressed out or frustrated with Copper. All those things don't matter at all! Time to be more grateful and not take advantage so much of all that is going well.
I am also taking advantage of our current situation. Really, there's too much going on to write about, and I really don't want to right now! But I admit it is sometimes very difficult to not have him in steady, consistent work. We are both very traditional in thinking about a mother's place in the home- if possible, I should be home and he should be out. (Except that I like my job and can't imagine not doing something, even when being home full time- but that's another story...) We're a bit reversed right now! We pray and wonder why the path has taken us this way, and maybe we're starting to realize how things happen when and how they do. With his very flexible schedule, Tim is now home with Copper (since she cannot return at all to her babysitter's- this is a very big change in plans!). It's a little tiny miracle it happened to work out this way at the time it did. While it won't be like this for long, it is comforting to know we don't have to panic to find someone to care for her right away. I am extremely particular about who watches her!
I don't welcome hardship on anyone, especially good friends and a new, tiny, beautiful baby. But I am grateful that their experience is helping me see all the good in my life and know that God takes care of us. The Lord and his ways are mysterious; it will sure be interesting to know what He has in store for us around the corner. In times I want to pull out my hair and cry, I hope to be grateful for everything I have, which is a lot, and know that there are miracles all around me I can't see, pushing me to grow and learn. I hope and ask for these little miracles all the time. I guess that's what faith is.
I'm so glad you posted this Cassie. I had a similar experience last week as well. A good friend of mine went in for her 20 week ultrasound and they think there may be complications and the baby may have down's syndrome. We are still waiting to hear more. I like you have not been able to stop thinking about it and do realize how blessed I am to have healthy children. It does put things into perspective and I just cry for the stress my friend is going through. I will keep your friend in my prayers as well.
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