We've tried taking lots of breaks the past few weeks. Wait. Actually, we haven't but keep meaning to. Besides an incredible amount of doctor's visits for both Copper and I, it seems life is busy, busy, busy. No wonder we go to bed at 8:30. Seriously, all of us. And morning comes too quick. The latest:
Copper: Sometimes I can't get enough of her. She's become SUPER affectionate and loves to be close. When her arms aren't strangling me to death from ginormous hugs, she's sitting right next to me and strokes my arm, leg, neck, hair, etc. And when she's not doing that, she pulls her socks off and puts her feet on my lap. When I don't start rubbing immediately, she takes my hand and places it on her feet until I rub them. It's pretty funny. She's the pickiest eater alive, which I'm okay with. I remember being super picky as a kid and I hated people giving me a hard time about it. Not the end of the world. She's a crack up at bedtime. The routine is brush teeth, read, pray. By the time we say "Fold your arms," she can't last and is usually carrying her blanket off to her room. She sometimes (happily) babbles herself to sleep. She's spunky and happy. Very aware of her surroundings and other people, easily picks up on other's emotions. Very empathic and loving. Already a little social worker, poor thing. Wish I had a recent pic. Too lazy/unmotivated to recharge the camera.
Babies: I hate referring to them collectively all of the time but since we don't have two names picked out, oh well. They are growing and growing. One and a half pounds each, so far. And already bruising the inside of me. And wearing me out. In nine weeks their lungs will be fully mature (risks go way down) and in eleven weeks there's a pretty sure possibility they would come home from the hospital at the same time I'm released after delivery. That's my goal. Even though the doc said, "They'd likely live if they were born right now," I'm not shooting for just being alive. I don't want to use up all my time off before they're even home, and I don't want the stress, anxiety, and worry of all the complications that could happen. Eleven weeks- maybe not as long as it sounds? Meanwhile, I think they're content poking each other and me. Hope they get fair shots at each other and one isn't getting brutalized more than the other.
Me: I have a really hard time keeping up on everything I need to do, easily adding to existing feelings of inadequacy. But I'm accepting that everything I do won't be enough so I might as well let it go. Sometimes it's easy (like not sweeping or vacuuming), sometimes it's hard (like having energy to actively play with Copper or having a million things to do at work). During the week I'm on my feet and moving all day long. By three or four, I am exhausted and everything leaves me winded. It's a bit beyond the tiredness felt of everyday life. My body just doesn't feel good nearly every day. Yesterday I spent a few hours in the hospital (not a big deal) to make sure things were on track since contractions are a frequent part of what seems to be every hour of the day. Fell asleep there and it was the best nap I've had for a while! Sad. By the time weekends hit, I lay around and don't do much at all. Also sad.
Tim: Funny, funny, funny. He's my favorite person. Workaholic (now that work is available in as many hours as he'll take). Sixty hours a week means we don't see a lot of him. When he leaves Copper is just waking up, and when he comes home we have about 45 minutes until bedtime. So when the weekend hits, she's all his. They dance and run around and play hide and seek. Fun. Tim makes scary noises through my stomach at the babies and tells them to behave. He prays for them (well, all of us) and doesn't care that the house is pretty cluttered, dinner's never ready or even started, or that I'm too tired to do much of anything. He's happy and content most all the time. I know he's really tired too but he doesn't show it or complain. Unlike his wife. :)
Although it may not seem like it, life is really good and we are super blessed.
Copper: Sometimes I can't get enough of her. She's become SUPER affectionate and loves to be close. When her arms aren't strangling me to death from ginormous hugs, she's sitting right next to me and strokes my arm, leg, neck, hair, etc. And when she's not doing that, she pulls her socks off and puts her feet on my lap. When I don't start rubbing immediately, she takes my hand and places it on her feet until I rub them. It's pretty funny. She's the pickiest eater alive, which I'm okay with. I remember being super picky as a kid and I hated people giving me a hard time about it. Not the end of the world. She's a crack up at bedtime. The routine is brush teeth, read, pray. By the time we say "Fold your arms," she can't last and is usually carrying her blanket off to her room. She sometimes (happily) babbles herself to sleep. She's spunky and happy. Very aware of her surroundings and other people, easily picks up on other's emotions. Very empathic and loving. Already a little social worker, poor thing. Wish I had a recent pic. Too lazy/unmotivated to recharge the camera.
Babies: I hate referring to them collectively all of the time but since we don't have two names picked out, oh well. They are growing and growing. One and a half pounds each, so far. And already bruising the inside of me. And wearing me out. In nine weeks their lungs will be fully mature (risks go way down) and in eleven weeks there's a pretty sure possibility they would come home from the hospital at the same time I'm released after delivery. That's my goal. Even though the doc said, "They'd likely live if they were born right now," I'm not shooting for just being alive. I don't want to use up all my time off before they're even home, and I don't want the stress, anxiety, and worry of all the complications that could happen. Eleven weeks- maybe not as long as it sounds? Meanwhile, I think they're content poking each other and me. Hope they get fair shots at each other and one isn't getting brutalized more than the other.
Me: I have a really hard time keeping up on everything I need to do, easily adding to existing feelings of inadequacy. But I'm accepting that everything I do won't be enough so I might as well let it go. Sometimes it's easy (like not sweeping or vacuuming), sometimes it's hard (like having energy to actively play with Copper or having a million things to do at work). During the week I'm on my feet and moving all day long. By three or four, I am exhausted and everything leaves me winded. It's a bit beyond the tiredness felt of everyday life. My body just doesn't feel good nearly every day. Yesterday I spent a few hours in the hospital (not a big deal) to make sure things were on track since contractions are a frequent part of what seems to be every hour of the day. Fell asleep there and it was the best nap I've had for a while! Sad. By the time weekends hit, I lay around and don't do much at all. Also sad.
Tim: Funny, funny, funny. He's my favorite person. Workaholic (now that work is available in as many hours as he'll take). Sixty hours a week means we don't see a lot of him. When he leaves Copper is just waking up, and when he comes home we have about 45 minutes until bedtime. So when the weekend hits, she's all his. They dance and run around and play hide and seek. Fun. Tim makes scary noises through my stomach at the babies and tells them to behave. He prays for them (well, all of us) and doesn't care that the house is pretty cluttered, dinner's never ready or even started, or that I'm too tired to do much of anything. He's happy and content most all the time. I know he's really tired too but he doesn't show it or complain. Unlike his wife. :)
Although it may not seem like it, life is really good and we are super blessed.
Awww Cass....I wish I lived close enough to help. We'll keep you all in our prayers, too. I do have girls that can help in the summer and they will play with babies for free!
ReplyDeleteI love you guys! Such a cute family! I hope you get the rest you need! Thanks for spending time with us when we came to Utah. You guys are the best!!!
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